After asking everyone I could think of and searching for an answer, it seemed like my only option for removing the outer rear wheel bearings from my stub axles was to go to a shop and have them pulled.
As you might have been able to guess, this is not an option for me, as I am extraordinarily pig headed and cheap. Enter Harbor Freight.
For $49.99 I bought this.
A full wheel bearing puller set.
Setup was straight forward enough.
I set the contraption very loosely in my vise so it still has room to expand, but won't spin. The threaded rod on the top pushes against the axle while the silver bearing pullers lift the bearing off the stub axle.
A few spins of the breaker bar and shablam.
There are two surfaces on the stub axle that need to be pulled through the bearing.
Repeat with both sides and you're done!
I had this whole job done in about 45 minutes both sides.
I very highly recommend this kit as long as it fits your specific wheel bearings. On my 73 240z it just barely fit.